Scientifically Matched (2022) Dessin par Edwin Loftus

John and Mary are so happy knowing that they have been matched by sophisticated computer algorithms as 98% compatible. They share so many values and common interests and they live only four miles apart.
Both want to put off children until they are more firmly established in their career pathways. In the meantime, they will enjoy chatting about topics of deep concern to both of them, enjoy common recreational interests, and the company of friends.
They don't yet know that both of them hid some information that they thought would make them less likely to find the partner in life they wanted.
Their relationship will be brief with each ending up feeling the other in many ways betrayed their trust in them. But for the moment, they are both young and pretty and the future before them looks bright and promising.
Most people in their youth look for the opportunities that will become their "role in life". But having not yet lived a large percentage of their potential lives, they are explorers in unknown territories.
They adapt to different settings, trying to be themselves and find their place, but often compromising and taking on literal roles based on observations of others they believe have already successfully adapted to those settings. Like our chimpanzee cousins, humans have a great facility for mimicry and often must adapt to three distinct environments, home, work and their social milieu, learning different roles for each.
A genuine study of "personality" would need to take these different settings into account and also account for the natural rhythms each of us establishes in daily living.
And on top of that, we are, particularly in young adulthood, rapidly adapting from being dependent to more independent. A questionnaire or interview from the start of the year is likely to be outdated by the end of the year, or sooner.
And the world around us, even in those semi-isolated settings, is constantly changing. What yesterday seemed like a solid rock that you could count on, may tomorrow turn to sand and be blown away.
The chances that an online dating service, or even an in-person screening, will result in one finding one's best choice in a mate is extremely remote, (though they say it does happen). But I don't mean to be overly critical of such services. They at least facilitate the meeting of new people with some modicum of greater safety than a tavern would.
We are all victims of a changing world. Just because it is changing, doesn't mean 'for the better' and it doesn't mean we need to like it or just go along with it.
Unfortunately, best time to start a life is at its beginning, but "youth is wasted on the wrong people."
If science really could play a role in human relationships, we would reverse aging and experience, with beauty and vigor and skip naivete altogether.
Living does get easier as we experience and learn, not our roles, but our means of self-expression and fulfillment. Alas, by then we're achy and unattractive and get fatigued too easily, but that is the way of life. It's helps to approach it with a sense of humor since the joke's on us.

Thèmes connexes

Dating-ServiceMatch-MakingLifeChangeRole-Playing